WE’RE DOWN TO THE WIRE FOLKS!! The 2020 Birmingham Red Dress Run kicks off Friday, Feb.14th!! Quick business, nudity will be allowed on the third floor where all the Hasher’s will be staying. The final schedule is as follows:

Friday 4 PM we open the coolers and start poppin tops. This begins the check in process. Make a point to meet a new face as there will be hashers from far and wide.

Dinner begins at 6 and consist of a gourmet potato bar. This should carb you up for the long-haul that is Friday night binge drinking.

Draft Punk starts at 7 and will be hosted by the one and only, Prince Fungus cuming all the way from Music City to reign over the festivities. Bring your snottiest craft beers. The beer you consider superior to all else just so you get the bragging rights for draft punk Birmingham RDR 2020.

Next on the agenda we kick off the Sweetheart and Sparkles Valentine's Prom. Wear the sparkliest, twirliest, sluttiest dress you can conjure up and draw as much attention while remaining within the confines of legal public decency. Don’t wanna be too cliché but it is 2020 so think 1920s if you need a point of reference, but yes, it’s already been done and we’re going to beat that dead horse again. Otherwise, you do you.

Birmingham RDR has a tradition of crowning a new queen at each event. Cum Scout, the illustrious reigning queen, will be in attendance to crown a new queen for the 2020 seat up for grabs. No idea what he has up his skirt for this event but anxious to find out.

Afterward, there will be karaoke for the brave and a shot trail for the not so brave. Everyone else can pivot between the two.

Saturday morning starts off with a Mimosa/Bloody Mary bar as well as the Java H3 tasting. Coffee aficionados are almost as obnoxious as craft beer drinkers. Be sure to bring your favorite beans and french press!! Just be aware, you will be harshly judged on your offering to the hangover gods.

As the Saturday morning resurrection kicks into high gear this will be the time to sell/buy wares at the hab fair. Bring all the socks with the cool sayings, the personalized mugs, fanny packs and other 4imprint merch for the hab heads. TAKE MY MONEY MF!!!

Saturday after lunch, we board a bus for Irondale where opening circle will be RA’ed by our own lovely PBR and you know the girl can pull a circle. LET THE TRAIL BEGIN!! You’re in for a treat as seasoned ass-kicking professional hares, AFLAC and Catcher in the Eye, take you over the hills, through the woods, and through the tunnels. Be prepared for shiggy and don't forget your cranium lights (and helmets) Safety third! Closing circle will be back at the hotel in the parking lot.

Please feel free to take this time to nap, get in a quickie, clean up, IV drip, whatever you gotta do to get up to get down for dinner at 6 followed by a raffle with fabulous prizes to raise additional monies for the Crisis Center of Birmingham. So bring your dollar-dollars and increase your chances of winning some really cool stuff.

IT’S SATURDAY NIGHT and we‘re doing a scavenger hunt hosted by Suppository Depository (aka Deep) and Head Shoulders Knees and Cum (knees and cum). I urge you to save a few brain cells for this endeavor, they may or may not be necessary. The one with the most toys wins and there can only be one!!

Sunday morning GTFO!! Brunch worthy local institutions will be suggested, organized and allegiances will be formed as the locals claim their place is the best. Out of towners throw a dart, it’s all good. Inflict further damage on that liver before setting out on the long drive home where you reminisce about the weekend with a shit-eating grin spread across your face. SEE YOU ALL SOON!!

Please note, only the first 100 PAID regos will recieve full gimmes

cranium light, shiggy clothes, red dress, coffee, French press, craft beer, money to spend for charity, fabulousness for sweethearts and sparkles