Hey wankers, dust off your bad decisions — it’s THAT time of year again. Time to pillage your mom’s underwear drawer, yank those mystery sheets that somehow smell like regret off your bed, or hit Goodwill like a raccoon with a credit card in search of the classiest trash you can find.

Cum one, cum all to the 14th Anal Black Tie, Lingerie, or Toga Pub Crawl
It’s classy. It’s trashy. It’s legally questionable.

Your shitty hares will drag you all over town in a heroic quest for the golden nectar, ending with deconstructed sandwiches, snacks, and whatever dignity you have left.

Hares: TBA
wHen: Saturday, January 31st, 2026
wHat time: 3:00 pm show / 3:30 pm go
wHere: Probably Pinkie Masters (don’t act surprised)
sHiggy: .69 (nice)
wHy: For the beer, obviously
wHo: Hashers AND virgins

How much:
$50 make you holla (virgins included)
$55 day-of because procrastination has consequences

wHat to Bring:
• Yourself (mandatory)
• ID (also mandatory)
• A phone capable of calling your drunk ass an Uber
• A thirst for adventure (and beer)

Please rego by Jan 24th if you plan to cum so we can make enough bacon for you beautiful disasters.
Refund deadline: 1/17/2025 — after that, you’re just emotionally refunded.

On-on