The "Aren't You Glad You Aren't in Florida? Man!" Trail

Grab your emotional support alligator and come pay tribute to that supremely strange character that is Florida Man! Admire the meth-fueled crimes while naked tacky lawn ornaments! "West Hyattsville" might not be as fun to say as "Lake Okeechobee" but at least this trail will be blissfully devoid of sawgrass, palmetto bugs, feral anacondas, and Ron DeSantis.

Yes, we will be going just across the border (it really isn't that far) to get away from the boringly familiar neighborhoods that might be feeling a little stale... because nothing livens things up more than a little chaotic Florida Man energy! Your hares may be old, but we ain't retired yet, so come out for a flamingo-free* romp that will have you saying, "Well, it ain't no Disney World." * - unless we break out a fla-bong-o?

PRELUBE: Acapulco Spirit

YOU MUST SIGN UP AND PAY VIA HASH REGO IF PAYING BY CARD

When: 6:45 PM Thursday, July 17, 2025. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!

Where: West Hyattsville Metro - follow marks to start

Nearest Capital Bike Share: at the station

Hares: Special Red, Pinnochi-Ho, Quid Pro Blow, Screeching Eargasm

Trail Details:
- Runners: 1.9 mi. first half / 1.9 mi. second half
- Walkers: 1.0 mi first half / 1.3 mi. second half
- Shiggy: 5.69

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to A. Bring your own vessel, a cranium light, dry shoes, bug spray, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is required if paying by card! Be smart, have fun.

End Metro: same

Last Trains Out:
Branch - 2340
Greenbelt - 0033

On After*: Acapulco Spirit

Specials: I am Special!

*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation