EWH3 #1473: Fuck My Tatas Birthday Trail, June 19, 2025, Cleveland Park (Red)

Once upon a time, back in the year 2001, the baby that would one day be known as How Much Would Could a Woodchuck Fuck entered the world, kicking, screaming, and probably thirsty for a beer.

On the very same date, [redacted] years before, Ha-Cum-On My Tatas also joined us on this giant ball of molten rock we call Earth. Within her first year of life, a 12-pack of beer was [allegedly] dropped on her head, explaining both her passion for the beverage and comfort among such a large group of half minds.

In honor of these two historical events, join us for a celebratory run/walk/stumble through Rock Creek Park, featuring your birthday babes, beer (definitely), and jello shots (maybe).

Prelube and end will both be at Lyman’s because *birthday queens drink free.*

YOU MUST SIGN UP AND PAY VIA HASH REGO IF PAYING BY CARD.

When: 6:45 PM Thursday, June 19, 2025. Pack will be away right at 7:15 PM, don’t be late!

Where: Cleveland Park metro (Alleyway next to 2755 Ordway St NW)

Nearest Capital Bike Share: Connecticut Ave & Ordway St NW / Cleveland Park Metro

Hares: Chuck Fuck, Ha-Cum-On My Tatas, mystery hares

Trail Details:
- Runners: 1.8 mi. first half / 2.4 mi. second half
- Walkers: 0.8 mi first half / 1.3 mi. second half
- Shiggy: 3.69

Miscellaneous Crap: Trail is A to Z (0.5 mi to Georgia Ave-Petworth Metro). Bring your own vessel, a cranium light (for walkers, too!), bug spray, and a full water bottle. Sign up on Hash Rego is required if paying by card! Be smart, have fun.

WE ALSO HAVE A BAG VAN FOR ALL THE FUCKS YOU WANNA LEAVE IN IT

End Metro: Georgia Ave-Petworth

Last Trains Out:
Branch Ave - 11:46 PM
Greenbelt - 12:27 AM

On After*: Lyman’s

Specials: Chuck Fuck and Tatas drink free because we’re special

*On Afters are an unofficial hash adjacent event. Please use your best adult judgment to decide about your participation.